The Philippines will host the Olympics—but not soon. This was obtained in a report from Malacañang the other day, according to a reliable source, that a statement was made by President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo before she left for Beijing to attend the opening ceremonies of the 29th Olympiad.
The source also said that he even got hold of confidential copies of a “Master Plan” for the said event. However, only the logo for the Olympic hosting was available as of press time—as shown here. According to the whole crap—err...report—the city of Manila (where this ambitious undertaking was said to take place) will have a major overhauling of sorts. Bits of information regarding the hosting gathered from our Malacañang mole are as follows:
1) The whole Malate area will be leveled to give rise to the main stadium as well as the Olympic Village. A total of around 12 hectares.
2) The Rizal Memorial Coliseum will still be used as venue for some track and field events, for sentimental reasons.
The source also said that he even got hold of confidential copies of a “Master Plan” for the said event. However, only the logo for the Olympic hosting was available as of press time—as shown here. According to the whole crap—err...report—the city of Manila (where this ambitious undertaking was said to take place) will have a major overhauling of sorts. Bits of information regarding the hosting gathered from our Malacañang mole are as follows:
1) The whole Malate area will be leveled to give rise to the main stadium as well as the Olympic Village. A total of around 12 hectares.
2) The Rizal Memorial Coliseum will still be used as venue for some track and field events, for sentimental reasons.
3) The Manila Zoo will remain as that—filthy.
4) Manny Pacquiao—if still living—will bear the Olympic Torch; his son if he’s already deceased.
5) 68 million balloons will be released in the sky. As a symbol it's '68.
6) Total cost of the project: 10 trillion pesos.
7) Source of budget: kick-backs from another ZTE deal.
8) Only athletes from 4 continents shall be participating the said event since by that time North and South America will be underwater due to irregular tectonic activity in the mid-40’s (they even predicted that?!).
6) Total cost of the project: 10 trillion pesos.
7) Source of budget: kick-backs from another ZTE deal.
8) Only athletes from 4 continents shall be participating the said event since by that time North and South America will be underwater due to irregular tectonic activity in the mid-40’s (they even predicted that?!).
9) A huge auditorium will be built for beer-guzzlers 500 meters from the oval track (I wonder why?). The place will be named Nick Joaquin Tavern, to commemorate our National Artist for literature and symbol of friendship, camaraderie, and drunkeness.
10) Since the world's oil will all dry up by 2056, GMA plans (yeah she’ll still be president) to build bridges that will span the Pacific Ocean, South China Sea, and other bridges.
11) China will host the said event. Hey wait a minute…
10) Since the world's oil will all dry up by 2056, GMA plans (yeah she’ll still be president) to build bridges that will span the Pacific Ocean, South China Sea, and other bridges.
11) China will host the said event. Hey wait a minute…
LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL! LOL!
ReplyDelete"China will host the said event. Hey wait a minute…"
Hmmnnn.... is it possible that by 2068, the Philippines will be just another province of China?
I hope that the Philippines will one day host. I would love to go there. By the way, you have a pretty interesting blog going on here. My blog is http://fateiscallingyou.blogspot.com if by any chance you are interested in link exchanges. I'm trying to save the world ;)
ReplyDeleteCrap blog.
ReplyDeletehahahaha that's a funny joke.. maybe it might come true, but lol siguro ang mga naglalaro na ay ang ating mga apo.hahaha
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